Afterword
"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro..."
Hunter S. Thompson
i
The author of HOW-2 Meet Women considers himself a card-carrying
nerd, even to the extent of wearing a pocket protector. He is, among
other things, a programmer, software developer, and technical writer* (author of a Guide and a HOWTO for the
Linux Documentation Project
and a past contributor to Electronic Design magazine and the Linux Gazette). Although happily
married for over a decade, he will never forget his origins, his long
lonely bachelor years.
If HMW has something of the flavor of a technical "howto", this
is hardly accidental. It approaches the topic from the standpoint of
an engineer, stressing algorithms (methods) that facilitate getting
the job done. The book is based on the premise that a functional
relationship with a woman is as intricate and awe-inspiring a structure as
a well-designed suspension bridge or an elegant digital logic circuit.
From that point of view, human interaction becomes, in a sense, an
elaborate exercise in problem solving, and moreover something that can
be codified and taught in bite-sized chunks. A touch of subjectivity and
humor flavor the brew, but without diluting its emphasis on the practical.
The intended audience is primarily shy single men, but much of the content
is gender neutral, and the author has received favorable comment on it
from women.
ii
In a bygone era, hard-won wisdom gained from lore and accumulated
experience passed from father to son, or from master to apprentice.
Guilds and secretive elites jealously guarded specialized knowledge.
Keeping the masses ignorant circumscribed their lives and preserved
the status quo. The invention of the printing press, and, in
our own time, the personal computer changed all that and gave access to
virtually unlimited information to any sufficiently motivated literate
person. On balance, this seems a favorable development, but it has
drastically accelerated the pace of social change and let loose the
demon of unbridled technology. It has made possible the publication of
information that can cause unintended consequences.
The major advances in civilization are processes that all but wreck the
societies in which they occur.
Alfred North Whitehead
There were ethical issues to consider before releasing HOW-2 Meet
Women upon an unsuspecting public. Certain of the techniques contained
therein could potentially be used by unscrupulous men to seduce and
exploit women. Yet, it must be assumed that predators and manipulators
already have the requisite knowledge for plying their sinister trade, as
indeed they have been with such devastating effect for all of recorded
history and beyond. And the need is there, it is painfully obvious,
to put shy men on something of an equal footing with their more socially
adept fellows. In a sense, this is part of the evolutionary "arms
race" between predators and decent people, and any step taken toward
equalizing matters is a blow for civilization.
iii
The question naturally arises whether the author is holding anything back,
if important revelations and secrets have been omitted from this book.
The short answer is a simple yes. Some topics are too inflammatory,
ethically ambiguous, or perhaps just a bit too "advanced" to appear
in what is essentially a primer on acquiring the social graces and
establishing relationships. Moreover, some things are better left
undiscussed, remaining to be discovered by those blessed (or damned)
few who are capable of coupling bitter experience with rare flashes of
insight. The readers of this book, and most of the rest of the human race
for that matter, will likely be none the poorer for remaining ignorant
of this dangerous higher wisdom.
iv
So, where do we go from here? The author will continue to put words on
paper, or, as it were, onto his Web site. You, the reader, will continue
your quest, somewhat wiser hopefully, to realize your human potential. Men
will continue to seek women, and women men... and the world will go on
with business as usual.
The author wishes to bestow his admittedly limited blessings on the
readers of HMW. You deserve your shot at happiness.
May you have passionate and fulfilling relationships.
Never eat at a place called Mom's.
Never play cards with a man named Doc.
And never lie down with a woman
who's got more troubles than you.
--Nelson Algren
"What Every Young Man Should Know"
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Comments
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* The author is available for writing and documentation projects. Fee negotiable.